The opening scene of the movie "Saving Private Ryan" is loosely based on games of dodgeball Chuck Norris played in second grade
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate
Chuck Norris doesn't bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint
It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes
Chuck Norris once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink
Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer
Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door
Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night
There is no "ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control
Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird
Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.
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